“Whatever you are physically…male or female, strong or weak, ill or healthy – all those things matter less than what your heart contains. If you have the soul of a warrior, you are a warrior. All those other things, they are the glass that contains the lamp, but you are the light inside.”
~ Cassandra Clare
My migraine journey began at age 16, with what I thought were sinus headaches. I have since learned that many people think this exact same thing. After finally seeing a doctor, I learned they were indeed migraine and was started on Propranolol, with hardly ever a break through migraine. Propranolol worked beautifully for several years, until my body decided to play a trick on me. In early 2001 I developed Adult Onset Asthma. Beta Blockers such as Propranolol exacerbate asthma symptoms. I had to stop taking the Propranolol at once, which caused several unpleasant side effects due to the number of years I had been on it.
The worst thing that happened was that my migraine became out of control and turned chronic, a state that hasn’t changed in eighteen years. In fact in the last eight months, I have swung back and forth, between chronic and intractable migraine, I will touch on this again. It took much trial and error to find the right headache specialists. They are not all created equally!! And more trial and error finding a preventive that would work and I didn’t have allergic reactions to. Thank goodness today I have a doctor who works with me on my treatment plan, is kind and caring, totally gets me, and has a great office staff — sometimes that can be almost as important as having a great doctor.
The last eight months or so have been a real battle, dealing with intractable migraine and weather triggers, which also cause my fibromyalgia to flare, leaving me exhausted by pain. The fatigue can leave me with a foggy brain, problems with spoken or written words, which is so very frustrating! I began to have nightmares, waking crying, punching and kicking, from the pain. The doctor gave me Amitriptylin 25mg to take at bedtime, this helped for a short while, but the nightmares returned. My poor husband, he can tell I’m crying and talking in my sleep, but my words make no sense. I always wake myself up. Yes migraine is more than a headache, but it is also so much more than a migraine. It touches every part of our lives. It is truly a daily battle for me and one I want to win everyday! Do I always win? No in the sense that the pain is still there, but yes because I’M still here. I take this journey/battle one day at a time! I might not win every battle, but I will win the war! I am a Migraine Warrior!
In the picture is my WARRIOR bracelet. I wear it everyday to remind myself of what I’m capable of. The stickers I added sunglasses, rain clouds, help, together and love, are symbols of my migraine life. Sunglasses ~ my eyes are super sensitive to light, Rain Clouds = migraine, Help ~ even warriors need help. My husband is super supportive, I am very blessed. He gets upset with me if I say that I feel guilty about him pitching in and cooking or doing laundry. He always tells me that they are his chores too, he’s retired and that does make a difference. He is very special! Together ~ Migraine Warriors need other warriors, to share support, encouragement, inspiration and hope! Love ~ I love my fellow migraine sister’s, I never could have made it this far without you!
“Courage, above all things is the first quality of a warrior.” Sun Tzu
Live with hope,
Roni
* Special Thanks to Michelle Tracy for showing me where to buy my Warrior bracelet, love you girl!
